The Art of R for Ds
by unholynight
Summary: One month…he had stalked Kurt Hummel for one month. The anniversary of that day would start in 25 minutes. Right after Glee club ended. His plans would soon be set into motion.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello there! I'm a huge Puck/Kurt fan! Love them! So, I decided to try my hand at this pairing. **(hopefully people that read my other stories wont be so upset with me that I've had my Sloth update and when I return to writing on my own, this is the first thing I do xD )

**Yeah, well, Kurt still goes to McKinley, Finn and Rachel are still together, and I may bring Blaine into the mix later on…Not sure yet. So, hope y'all like this chapter!**

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Puck stared ….

And stared…..

And…..stared…His eyes finally decided that they had been opened long enough. He blinked a few times until his eyes stopped feeling over the top dry.

After they felt fine, he tried again…..he stared….squinted….and grit his teeth…

_Turn this way…come on….just turn your head this way….that's it….come on….No!….come on…come on!…_ "Look this fucking way damn it!"

The small group fell into total silence and turned to look at the mohawked teen. Mr. Schuester cleared his throat and sighed. "Ok Puck…we're looking, what is that you wanted to say." Puck opened his mouth and slouched back in the chair and crossed his arms. He shook his head and tried to avoid everyone's gaze.

So maybe his idea didn't work. He was certain it was going to though. He had heard somewhere that people can 'feel' others staring at them and so, he tried. Sadly, that backfired on him.

Puck looked over to where Mr. Schuester was babbling on again about a song he thought was perfect for their next competition. And as expected, Rachel got up and started commenting on the chosen piece. Finn backed her up all the way like a good boyfriend he was. Over to where Artie was, he was too busy smiling up at Britney to notice Mr. Shue and Rachel having a little spat over the music. Santana, Next to Quinn was obviously sexting someone. Quinn too busy to notice as she mood goo-goo faces at Sam.

Tina and Mike leaned against each other, obviously in their own little Asian world. Mercedes flipped pages to a new magazine and took pictures of certain things on her cell. Most likely to look for them when she and Kurt went shopping.

And then there was Kurt. The most fashionable person in all of McKinley High. Or most possibly Lima, Ohio. Puck watched as the shorter teen examined his nails and chewed on his piece of gum. Most likely orange flavored. One of Kurt's favorite fruits.

Puck noticed how Kurt pouted when he saw something he didn't like. His bottom lip stuck out as he looked into his bag and reached for something. A nail filer with a pointed tip was in his hand. Carefully, Kurt used the end to take out what was probably a piece of dirt from his nails.

Puck averted his gaze from the other boy and sighed. One month…he had stalked Kurt for one month. The anniversary of that day would start in 25 minutes. Right after Glee club ended.

Puck hadn't even realized he was doing it until a week later when he found himself in the middle of the night, looking through Kurt's window and hoping to catch a glimpse of the other boy doing something. Or at least him naked. So far, all Puck had managed to do was see Kurt in a towel. He had been upset when he realized Kurt changed in what looked like to be a walk in closet.

Puck had decided he would woo Kurt. That idea had struck him about a week ago as he sat in the library. A book laid across his lap as he wrote in it in bright red sharpie. As he had stood up to go to lunch, another book had fallen and hit him on the head.

He picked it up to throw it, but the title caught his attention. _**"The Art of Romance for Dummies"**_.It was sign from the big man himself. Puck smiled and stuffed the book in his bag and made his way out of the room.

For the first time in a long time. Puck read a book from cover to cover. He even made sure to take some notes. After all, he wasn't going to woo anyone. Oh no. This was Kurt fucken Hummel he had to woo.

Puck sighed for what felt like the millionth time. Glee club was about to end and they had accomplished Absolutely nothing. Mr. Schuester tapped his face with one of his fingers as Rachel continued to talk. Everyone else had ignored them and gone into their own little worlds.

Mr. Schue looked at his watched and sighed. He stood from the stool he had been sitting on and clapped his hands, which caused Rachel to stop talking and everyone else to look at him. "I think we should end Glee club early today. Have a good weekend Guys." Rachel opened her moth to say something else, but closed it back up and grabbed her bag and walked over to Finn.

Everyone else also began to make their way out of the room. Puck watched as Kurt stretched and began to grab his things. This was Pucks chance.

Rule number 5 in the Art of R for D's was to make the other person like a Damsel. This Puck so could do. He had planned it after all. Even practiced.

Puck made his way down the small steps and turned back, pretending he had forgotten his bag. He made sure he had timed everything.

Kurt was about to make his way down the second row of steps, but Puck, 'accidentally' kicked a chair, which caused Kurt to trip. Puck just so happened to be right there and caught Kurt against himself and just happened to turn so that one his hands was on Kurt's lower back, and the other on his shoulder and making the shorter teen dip down.

"Careful Hummel. These steps are quite dangerous. But no worries right? After all, I'll be right here to catch ya if that ever happens." Puck gave Kurt his best smirk. He was sure that the position and closeness would make Kurt blush like a girl.

Puck waited for the light pink tint to appear on Kurt's face, but it never did. Kurt looked up at Puck with a blank face. His mouth set in a bored line. He clicked his tongue and sighed. "Wow….thanks Puck. You trip me, then catch me. Very heroic indeed. Now….please let go. I don't want any wrinkles on my shirt. Mercedes and I are going to the mall and I refuse to look disheveled."

Kurt made his way out of Puck's hold and next to Mercedes. Puck watched as the pair of Divas walked away. He frowned when his plan failed. He needed to set another plan now. That was when, once again, an idea struck him.

The Art of R for D's rule number 12, _to catch their attention, dress to impress. _

This called for a stalking spr-…uh shopping spree!

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**So there! My first chapter! I love cliché things, so expect many of them! Hopefully some people liked this! If not, then that's ok! I like writing it anyways!**

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXO**

**Laterzzz!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Ugh, it took too long for me to update T-T. I have no school today! It was closed do to in climate weather, leaving me time to type away!**

**Ok, so thank you very much for the kind words and love and stuff! Here's chapter two! Enjoy everyone!**

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Puck turned around and looked at himself in the mirror. He passed a hand through his Mohawk and smirked at himself. "Noah Puckerman, you are one _hot _piece of ass." After flexing his arms to make sure they still looked good, Puck made his way out of his house and to school. He made sure to put a clean towel over his seat incase there was anything there that could dirty his new outfit. After all, he practically gave up his 2 week salary on one outfit.

After a few minutes, the tall teen reached his destination and looked around. Same scene as always was before him. With a quick look at himself in the rear view mirror, Puck nodded to himself and stepped out of the car.

People that stood outside couldn't help but turn their heads and look as Puck strutted up to the large building. Some girl's jaws dropped while guys raised an eyebrow. The Jocks just looked at one another in confusion.

Puck smirked and titled his head slightly as he passed girls that ogled and checked him out. Oh yeah, he looked _good. _

As he turned on one of the halls, Puck tried to remember the names of the clothing brands he had bought. After all, Kurt may ask him, and he had to be ready for anything.

After looking around for a few seconds, Puck spotted his target. Said target also had a very large black woman that could definitely kill him if he didn't tread carefully.

Puck put his hands in his pockets and made his way to Kurt and Mercedes. He made sure not to scuff his shoes. A small piece of advice he had received from one of the employers working at the shoe department.

"Yo, Hummel, what's up?" Kurt rolled his eyes and stopped talking. He turned around to tell Puck off, but stopped. His mouth hanging open.

Puck. _The _Noah Puckerman, was wearing designer clothes. Kurt could spot a true legit piece of clothing brand from anywhere.

But what was more amazing to Kurt was that the outfit Puck was wearing was, actually a great outfit that fit the taller tanner teen perfectly. From the black Armani labeled shirt that beautifully hugged his upper body, to the Gucci pants that hung on his hips and rode low enough to allow any lucky person to see a stretch of tan skin if Puck were to stretch.

Kurt noted that it just didn't end there. Puck also wore a Dolce and Gabbana belt. The buckle had the signature letters to prove worth. Kurt looked lower to the shoes to see if Puck really went all out, and all that was fashion, he sure did. Not only were the shoes rebellious, they matched the outfit. World Industry shoes weren't top fashion, but they worked with what Puck was wearing.

The necklace and wrist bands were also a nice touch to Puck's outfit, but Kurt had been more distracted by the rest of Puck's wardrobe to notice them.

"You like?" It was said in a sing song voice. Puck leaned against the lockers and smirked down at Kurt. The shorter teen snapped out of it and smacked his lips. Kurt put a hand on his hip as he looked at Puck. Mercedes rolled her eyes at Puck.

"Boy, I ain't even gonna ask. Kurt, lets go." Before Mercedes pulled Kurt away, he stopped her. "I'll join you in a bit Mercedes, I just want a little, _chat, _with Puck." Mercedes shrugged her shoulders and walked off.

"Ok Puck, what, is all this. I mean, yesterday you _saved_ me, _after _causing it, and today you show up in high class brand name designer clothes! Are you on something? Have you been taking some new medicine?" Kurt looked up at Puck with an uncertain gaze.

Puck smirked down at Kurt. "No way babe. I am perfectly sane. Other than that, what do you think?" Puck stepped back to let Kurt get a full view of him.

Kurt brought a hand to his chin and looked at up. "Not bad, for a beginner." Kurt lightly passed a hand through his hair. That was when he saw them.

"Puck, get out of the way!" …..too late.

Puck stood in the middle of the hall. Face and upper body covered in slushy. His expression as if he was a deer caught in head lights. Before he could react, Kurt pulled Puck by the arm to the closest bathroom and locked the door.

"Hurry, take it off!" Puck just looked at Kurt with a confused look on his face. It took about three seconds for him realize what had just happened. He was showing off, he had gotten slushied…all over….his outfit….fuck….

Quickly, Puck took off the shirt and his necklace and wrist band. He needed to get the nasty excuse for a drink off them. "Hand them over." Kurt quickly took the things off of Puck's hands and put them to the side. He took off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves and reached into his bag.

Kurt pulled out a little bag of something. After filling the sink with water, Kurt tipped the bag over to drop in a powder, which turned into foam in the water. He placed the shirt, necklace and wristbands in and sighed. He began to lightly scrub at the material until leaving it in to settle.

"That was close." Kurt sighed. He looked over at Puck who had been starring at him and watching him go the whole time he washed the items.

A light blush appeared on Kurt's face as he realized what he had just done. "Uh…you're clothes won' stain…just, um, let them settle for a few." Kurt looked down at his feet feeling embarrassed. It was what he usually had to do after he was slushied.

"Awesome! That damn shirt cost a fortune. If it was ruined, I would have died." Kurt rolled his eyes at Puck's statement. "And how do you think I felt about my clothes when you and your so called friends ruined countless of my outfits?" Kurt gave Puck a look.

The other could do nothing but smile like an idiot. "Sorry?" Kurt huffed. He rolled his sleeves back down. "Take out the shirt and try to gently wring it. You don't to get it wrinkled. Now, I'll be going."

Kurt was about to make his way out of the bathroom. "Wait!" Puck grabbed his arm and quickly let go when Kurt pulled away. "What is Puck." Puck scratched his head and cleared his throat. "Well, I, uh, kinda don't have anything to wear now. I mean, my shirt is wet and I don't have an undershirt, as you can see. So, would you happen to have an extra shirt or something?"

Kurt looked at Puck's exposed torso and quickly looked away. The other teen had a really good build. Kurt sighed. "If I did, I doubt it'll fit you. You're kind of….bigger than I am." Puck sighed and leaned against the wall.

Kurt suddenly remembered something. "Wait here." Kurt made his way out of the bathroom, leaving Puck alone.

After a few minutes, there was a delicate knock at the door. Puck opened the door and Kurt walked in. The halls were bare of any one since school had already begun about ten minutes ago.

Kurt placed something in Puck's hands. Kurt then quickly ran out of the small space and made his way to class.

Puck looked at the article of clothing in his hands and extended it to see it. It was a crisp white dress shirt. Puck looked at the marking. Gucci.

A smile came onto his face when he saw the little note attached to it. 'In case of serious emergency.' Beside that, Kurt had written something else. 'I better get this back.'

Puck carefully took the note off and put on the shirt. It fit him a little snug, but it fit non the less.

After carefully rolling up the sleeves, Puck took his wet shirt out and carefully folded to get the water out without terribly wrinkling it. After a few more squeezes, most of the water was out of the shirt, leaving it damp. Great. But then, Puck remembered the main heating system. Oh yes.

Before puck left the bathroom, he noticed that Kurt had forgotten his jacket. It was so another sign.

_Rule number 17 of The Art of R for D's, be a gentlemen and return what they lost. _

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**And there! Haha, Puck sure is full of himself. But who can blame him? Ok, so, hope you guys liked this chapter! **

**It's just a little bit longer than the other one! And like Kurt, I love fashion, I just shop cheaper :P**

**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**

**Laterzzz!**


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